For the first time in over two years, I have just spent two weeks where I have no daily internet or phone service. Admittedly hard for an information junkie like myself, but it's gotten easier as I let my addiction go and take "one day at a time". Online Anonymous?? Top this with basically only having Steve Lynch to talk to for two weeks (no other travelers want to be our friends or talk to us - can't figure out if everyone's all in luuuuuv, or if they are all icky Germans who are freaked out by an interracial couple. I never even considered this to be a possibility until SL pointed it out. Who knows?) and so yeah, I had a couple minor anxiety attacks where I had to go pace up and down the beach for an hour like a caged animal. Shades of my father not sleeping for nights at a time rear their ugly head. I'm getting better. And it's good for me, I know, to let all the day-to-day go while also finally allowing myself to get closer to someone I totally dig.
As time passes here and we enter the second full week of the daily schedule of eat/sleep/beach/read/play in sacred waterfall (in no particular order), I feel the tension of the past two years draining out of my body, and a permanant smile plus true inner strength coming back to me. It's a blessing to have the time to do this, and each additional day here I realize how incredibly fortunate I am.
That said, think we'll have to leave Thaan Sadet next weekend and possibly head to some place on Ko Samui where I can take my spazziness and channel it into 4 days of windsurfing lessons before heading back to Bangkok on the 31st.
(Seriously, though: are there ANY Germans left in their country? Who is running that place? And what's with the nuthugger bathing suits all up in my face all the time??)